Thursday, October 11, 2018

Day 1

Bad news brownies.

I really struggled about whether to post this because I didn't want to 1) be vulnerable and 2) turn it into anything remotely resembling a pity party. I'm fully committed to tackling this with humor, positivity, and grace (it's a real effort right now but I'm seriously trying).

I did ultimately (and obviously) decide it was the best thing for me to put myself out there and go through the exercise of sharing my journey through pretty much the scariest moment in my life. My goal is to take my fear and turn it on it's head. To take the dread that has haunted me pretty much my entire life, the thing that has taken the lives of the people most dear to me, that has now become my reality, and turn all the energy that has gone into that fear for so long into something positive and meaningful that I can draw strength from, and hopefully offer the same kind of comfort to others and touch a few lives.

I also want to bring some awareness that hopefully is semi-uncomfortable and hits close to home, and within that reaction causes some sort of positive action, whether it's a conversation, a self exam, or finally getting around to scheduling that mammogram.

And finally, I really want to connect with others that have been, or are going through, the same thing. Quite frankly it's hard to wrap my head around the reality of this right now considering two weeks ago I was the vision of good health and feeling pretty effing invincible. If you've been here before, or are here now, I'd love to connect for support/crying/laughing/whatever, but always with the goal to move forward, stay positive, and keep the end, the win, in sight.

Or if you want to just send good vibes, I'm cool with that too 

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